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butterflies vs. pigs i don't get enough email about butterflies, so i wantcha to all write me an email about how much ya like butterflies, ok? if i don't get around to replying to you, that means i liked your story best! *********************************************
well, it's mid-april now and there was some springtime weather a week or two ago, but from where i sit now all i see is crappy smelly snow and sleet. yes, sleet too! luckily old mister weather machine (my noggin!) here tells me that the weather is going to be like so: this weekend: warmer--butterfly weather!
this makes me happy because frankly, i love butterfly weather. does that surprise you? anger you maybe? well don't shoot the messenger man, i just dig the b-flies! and that don't stand for barflies, no sir, it stands for BUT-TER-FLIES! butterflies are so pretty. they come in tons of different colours, like pink and blue and red! they fly around and smile and they also make me SMILE!! i don't know what colour real butterflies are actually, but i know what colours the ones i think about are, and they are mostly pink and blue and red! and they smile all the time! sometimes i will pretend that i am a butterfly, and i will run around with my arms spread out and sing a little butterfly song. there aren't any specific words, but it's something like "toot toot! here comes butterflydrew! toot toot! vroom vroom! BUTTERFLLLLLLLLLLLLYYYYY!". it cheers me up always. just today my friend was like "andrew i think you're having a nervous breakdown" and i laughed, and then i ran around with my arms spread singing the butterfly song! that made me realize how much i really like butterflies. i mean, i used to think about them some of the time, but now that i think about them all of the time i am much happier! i can just sit in one spot for an hour and think about butterflies and laugh the whole time. like imagine a butterfly in a sombrero! imagine that! that's so amazing, that would be so great. a big red butterfly with light blue spots wearing a sombrero and sort of lying back against a wall, playing a guitar and humming as he nods off to sleep. i think he'd be called pedro butterfliano! haha, can't you just see him, lying there, strumming away with a bottle of beer in his hand? every once in a while too his wife would come out and offer him some tapas and he'd be all like "yes PLEASE!" and just munch them up hungrily. haha, then imagine a mariachi band made up of ALL BUTTERFLIES came along and were like "hey pedro, come on, we're going to the town square to play some songs for the people!", so pedro goes "no, i'm going to stay here and sleep!" and then nods off. hahaha, that would rule. man, i can't wait till i get to the butterfly world, that is going to rule so much. so i totally forget my point, just woke up with a bruise on my forehead and i'm not sure what happened, but i guess i blacked out again! but i sure love those butterflies. oh yeah, the weather! well like i said, it sure feels like butterfly weather! springtime beings the perfect weather for watching butterflies, chasing butterflies, or even just thinking about butterflies. the sun warms them all up and makes them come out and play, just like it makes grass grow, or makes leaves appear on trees or tries desperately to burn all the horrific, depressing, life-crippling thoughts from your brain. so be on the lookout for butterflies anytime now, and if you don't see any, just think about them! remember, in your imagination world, butterflies can look any way you want, and do anything you want them to! ***************************************************
well it's prom time, and i bet some people still don't have dates lined up right? probably the same people who thought they could at least keep their mind off of that fact by reading a good old eggpost right? well sorry, but don't worry, i fixed it! if you want a date, just print out the following picture and take it with you! when i went to my prom i got to take a princess (my mom:-), but you can take someone even more magical: a butterfly! start printing here: 899X7 X8997
there you go, now you have the prettiest prom date ever, a butterfly! the best thing too is that you can dress it up any way you want! YAY FOR BUTTERFLIES! *********************************************
WHO LIKES BUTTERFLIES? I DO! HOW COME? THEY RULE! *********************************************** hahah, i just had another thought: imagine if there was a butterfly who was a housepainter! so he'd be wearing one of those fullbody coverall suits and carrying a bucket of paint. no wait, forget that, imagine if he was a farmer! so imagine a butterfly in overalls, walking around surveying the land, and then he hops on a cow to take a ride! "YEEHAWW! GO BOSSY GO!!" he'd say, and that cow would scooch along fast-like! then later, the butterfly would go to slop out the pigs. imagine that, a butterfly in a pigpen with a bunch of pigs! seriously, think about that mental image, isn't it great? all the pigs would be sort of confused to start, all like "hey, there's a butterfly wearing overalls in here!", but then they'd totally get into it. they'd just you know, flow with it. pigs take life as it comes, kind of like butterflies do. that brings up an interesting point too: if i could either be a butterfly or a pig, which would i be? hmm, that's a good question. i think that at first glance i'd have to say butterfly, because i'd get to fly, but then again, a pig would be pretty cool too, cause i'd have that funny curly tail and I mean, i love those curly tails! but really, overall i think i'd have to go with the quiet elegant beauty of the butterfly. ************************************************* i'm going to sleep now, to dream about--you guessed it, butterflies! |
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